Ideas: For a Successful, Less Complicated Life!

When You Help Others You Help Yourself!

On October 15th 2008, I found the following short article entitled: "Blog Action Day 2008: Poverty, When You Help Others You Help Yourself", as was posted on: Life Learning Today  (Blog).

"Did you know that a major key to happiness is giving to others? This is substantiated in an excellent book by Rick Foster and Greg Hicks,”How We Choose to Be Happy: The 9 Choices of Extremely Happy People–Their Secrets, Their Stories.” In the book, they describe the profound effect giving to others can have on your level of happiness.

I discovered this book through the Awakening Joy course which I highly recommend.

When was the last time you gave (your time, energy, love, assistance) to someone else and how did it make you feel?

Why not make a difference for someone today by helping to end poverty? Here are 88 ideas to get you started. Here are a few of my favorite ideas:

* Eat meatless meals 2x a week. Donate that grocery money to a local food bank.

* Make a loan on Kiva.org.

* Have a “sponsor me” day. Donate money to a poverty relief cause for everyone who leaves a comment on your blog that day.

* Skip a weekly trip to the grocery store and donate the money saved to a food bank. I do this once a year for my family of 5. For that week we only eat what is left in the pantry or fridge. By the end of the week, pickings are slim and we get a sense of what it feels like to not have the luxury of tasty, well balanced meals every night.

* Have dinner on the floor and make it a very small meal (like chicken broth, watered down milk, and maybe a small piece of bread?) Talk about the blessings you have and that the meal represents those who don’t get to eat “big” on a daily basis.
* Volunteer at a soup kitchen!

* Don’t just talk to your kids about poverty - get them involved by having them go through their toys and clothes to find concrete things to pass along. The next time they want you to buy something for them - talk about what that money could buy for someone who had no food… then follow through and donate the money you didn’t spend.

If you want to get started by making a donation or if you want to learn more, there are several organizations and educational information listed here. Also check out what one person can do to make a difference"

Spiritual Money Practice To Eliminate Poverty

Here is an interesting article, I found, written by: Akami Gains, the creator of: Yes To Me  (Blog)

"Real cause of poverty

When we think about poverty, it’s so easy to focus on the existing tragedies such as the homeless people or the starving children in Africa. I feel for them, but I’m asking you to put those issues aside for a moment and think why poverty exists. Let’s take care of the root cause first.

Now imagine two individuals - two brothers, with the same educational background. Will they achieve the same level of financial status as they proceed in life? We’ve seen similar cases and know they won’t, right? So what makes one succeed, while the other fails miserably? It’s their thinking. One is focused on wealth, abundance, and success, and the other only sees lack and poverty in and around him.

In my previous bank job, I was told never to judge customers by their appearances. A stinky homeless-like guy may have tens of thousands of dollars while the guy in nice suit may be deep in debt. (As bank employees, we knew this.) I also read that Donald Trump once said, when the economy was down, that the homeless guys had more net worth than himself because they had some coins in their papercups while he was deep in debt.

So what makes Donald Trump rich? He focuses on abundance and success. While the guy on the street worries like crazy and never touches his savings.

Kiva: Empowering the have-nots

This understanding that poverty starts not from external lacks but from the internal scarcity thoughts has taken roots in our social awareness. For example, charity. Charity used to be about sending money to the needy. This only helped the needy superficially and temporarily. Now organizations like Kiva lends money to the people who currently don’t have the money but are willing to make some. They treat the people as those who have the full potential to become rich - just not there yet. This is empowering.

Do you still think there are absolute poverty? People who just can’t climb up from poverty because of their outwardly circumstances? Well, I’m not going to argue - there may be because this physical world is not perfect. For those of you who think that way, however, the real question may be: Are you using their poverty as an excuse for you to stay stuck?

I’ve seen this pattern of thought. For example, Po Bronson’s book, What Should I Do with My Life?: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question describes people who say something like “Oh, but those poor immigrants . . . they take the worst jobs . . . I feel bad being so picky about what I want to do in my life . . .” As an immigrant myself, I say BS. Don’t use us as an excuse of your procrastination and lack of courage. For the same token, don’t use people in poverty as your excuse. Pick up after yourself and the world will be a better place." .. [read the rest of this article]

Are You a People-Pleaser?

On October 12th 2008, I found this thought provoking article on: "People-Pleasing: The Price Of Being Too Nice And What To Do About It", written by: Shamelle Perera  the creator of: Enhance Life (Blog).

“Be good, be nice, be cool, share and care, don't be selfish, be reasonable, don't hurt others, help friends….”  Most of us have these values engraved within us, from childhood. The fact
is, being nice is a good thing, and we can only wish that more people were nice(er)!

Then.. there are those “extremely nice” people, who are focused on wanting to please others to the detriment of their own needs. Dr. Harriet Braiker, in her book The Disease To Please
classifies them as “people-pleasers”. At first glance, it may not even seem like a problem at all. In fact, the label people-pleaser may feel more like a compliment or a flattering self-description that you proudly wear as a badge of honor.

When being nice becomes a problem...

1. You’re stressing over a lot of things you shouldn’t be stressing!
2. You fail to deal with a problem (avoiding confrontation).
3. You are unwilling to speak up for yourself
4. Your niceness may even blind you to the fact that you are being manipulated and exploited.

Why does it matter so much to please someone else?

The culture we humans have created for ourselves is mainly driven by “what other people think,” the tension between the desire for approval and the fear of disapproval. Businesses, families, friendships, sports, politics; everything is heavily influenced by it. All of us from
time to time have a tendency to wonder “what others might think”, so I am not speculating that everyone who thinks this way is a people-pleaser! However, some tend to go overboard with it and as a result, self-esteem is all tied up with how much they do for others.

Overcoming a People-Pleasing Mindset

1. Accept That You Can’t Make Everyone Happy

I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ~Bill Cosby

Re-examine
the idea that you always have to be nice. Often it is based on the belief that if you act and think nicely, then bad things won’t happen to you. Unfortunately, believing in the absolute power of niceness doesn’t work, because life isn’t always fair. Some people may not like
you, for reasons beyond your control, or even because you are simply “too nice” for them.
 
So stop beating yourself up for trying to do the impossible. Recognize that the most important, effective and lasting approval is your acceptance of yourself. Look to your own
judgments and values.

2. Focus on your own best interest instead of avoiding conflict

Learn that it is OK not to be nice, that you can say negative things and have negative thoughts or feelings toward others. Give yourself permission to express anger appropriately, since continually suppressed anger can lead to frustration that can ultimately erupt in an explosion of aggression.

3. Don't wait, stop looking and let go!(if only it was that easy!)

Jonathan meticulously points out in his post The Secret to Happiness: Stop Caring,
that everything we need is right here, right now, in the present moment. Most of us fail to realize this and look "outward" to find happiness." .. [read the rest of this article]

Dealing With Your Character Flaws!

Here is an interesting article on: "Accepting and dealing with your character flaws", written by: Ryan Whiteside, as was posted on: Change your Thoughts For True Personal Development (Blog).

"There is this saying that “We all have issues that we need to deal with.” No matter how much of a well-rounded person you think you are, you should admit to the fact that nobody is perfect and there is a particular part of your personality which probably looks weird or is annoying for others.

However, these little quirks, annoying habits and personal rituals that you just cannot seem to get rid of what is makes each person unique and interesting.

What is a Better Way to Look at Your Character Flaws?

The first thing that you need to do when dealing with your character flaws is to accept it is a part of who you are. Again, remember that these characteristics are the things that make each individual unique, so you might as well accept it.

To have a deeper understanding of what character flaws are all about, here is a brief look into its two main types.

First, there is the minor character flaw. This includes a little quirk like habitual lateness that you just cannot seem to shrug off. Or being easily irritable, especially in the mornings.

How about having a boiling temper, when you easily get all hot and bothered over the little things?

Second, there are major character flaws – serious problems such as gambling, addiction or alcoholism.

Major character flaws are highly ‘treatable’ – there are professionals who can help get you out of your addiction or alcoholism. But what about the minor character flaws which is not readily obvious from an outsider’s point of view? Read on to find out how exactly you can deal with this.

Tips on Dealing with Your Character Flaws

Basically, dealing with minor character flaws can either be a short-term ‘treatment’ – or a lifelong process.

For example, if you are a habitual procrastinator – learning about time management can easily ‘cure’ you of this minor character flaw.

But what about being easily irritable? For this, you may want to analyze yourself and learn how this character flaw is affecting others." .. [read the rest of this article]

What Are the Best Things in Your Life?

Here is an interesting article, I found, written by: Alex Blackwell, the creator of: The Next 45 Years  (Blog).

“Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach.” - Clarissa P. Estes, PhD

"The last time I looked at my 401k statement my heart sank and perspiration started to bead on my forehead. In the spirit of looking at the glass as half-full, I reminded myself I was about 20 years from retirement and market corrections would happen that would help my 401k rebound and get my investments back into positive territory.

At the about the same time my statement arrived, I also received an email from my friend and fellow blogger Jonathan Nasman of Illuminated Mind asking me to participate in a series he was running entitled What’s Right With Your Life?

This is certainly a time we could be cynical. The economy in the United States, and the entire world for that matter, is just plain crappy. American citizens are facing a change in leadership during a time of doubt. Many believe our country is not strong enough to make it through these challenging times. I disagree.

Rather than launching into a persistent mode of trying to fix everything or solve the problems that can seemingly flood our lives at times, sometimes it’s just as important to take a step back and assess what’s right with our lives. When we do, we are better able to separate fear from fact and panic from sensibility.

There are real problems my family needs to solve. We have an adjustable-rate mortgage coming due, a large amount of student loan debt is hanging over our heads and our house needs some major repairs. And at the same time, there are many things going right in our life right, too.

* My wife, Mary Beth, passed her L.C.S.W licensing exam on her first attempt last week. After she completes about 1500 more supervision hours, she will be a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. This work is Mary Beth’s passion. She has hit her stride and found her mark with how she wants to make a difference in the lives of others.

* Our oldest son, Brandon, who graduated from college last May, has landed a really great job with an internet start-up company, Not only is he financially independent, he is also learning how to create a business from the ground up. These life and business skills are giving Brandon an important and valuable head start.

* Caitlin has settled into her second year of college and is hitting her grades out of the park – including Biology. Andrew will be participating in a high-profile baseball prospect camp in Arizona in a couple of weeks and Emily is having a real blast participating on her fourth-grade cheerleading squad." .. [read the rest of this article]

What is The Power of Expectation?

Here is an interesting article on:"Manifesting your Intentions: The Power of Expectation", written by: Lola Fayemi, the creator of: Nourishment For Your Spiritual Awakening  (Blog).

"How come my other half can often be found complaining (or moaning like a b*tch as I like to call it!) about everything and usually yet end up getting what he wants?

We have a little dance we like to do, he moans and I tell him that moaning will not help him get what he wants and to be aware of where he’s sending that energy. His eyes then glaze over as I lecture him on how he should partner with the Universe to get what he wants.

We’ve been doing this dance for years until now as I’ve decided I want to try another dance. Why? Because his business is in a much better state than mine so it’s time for me to learn from him. I thought you always get what you ask for? Surely all of his moaning is a block to the manifestation of his desires.

Apparently not, you see despite his moaning he KNOWS that things will turn out fine, so in his typically jammy way, it always does! Some say you always get what you ask for but I’m starting to suspect you always get what you EXPECT.

"I know there are many of you out there that are putting a lot of work into manifesting your desires.  You are meditating, visualising,reading, using affirmations, vision boards and various other methods and techniques, yet the dream you are chasing remains out of reach.  I urge you to look deeper at what you are expecting.

Yes, you may set an intention to meet your soul mate and use various attraction techniques to bring this person into your life, but this is not Weird Science (remember that film?) and no amount of conscious work or physical activity will overcome any negative expectations you have beneath the surface about this area of your life.  If you want to meet your dream partner, you’re going to have to start expecting it.  If you do not know where you current level of expectation is right now, have a look at the type of potential partners you are meeting, this is where your expectations are right now. 

I’m not advocating moaning but wholeheartedly support you in venting.  Part of the my boyfriend’s success in manifesting comes from his moaning, when he moans he gets things, like his negative expectations, of his chest which leaves room for him to access the positive expectations of the situation.  You may not currently have access to your positive expectations due to the distraction of your negative expectations.  You need to be honest about where you are before you can move anywhere.

Many of you have an understanding that “thoughts create things” but you may have developed a fear of ‘negative thinking’ because of this.  It’s part of the human condition to have negative as well as positive thoughts, your thoughts are not good or bad, they are just thoughts which carry different vibrations and produce different consequences.  When you have a negative thought and quickly cover it up with a positive one, the negative thought hasn’t gone anywhere and is actually more powerful under the surface than it is out in the open.  This buried negative thought is usually the source of or a contributing factor to your negative expectations. " .. [read the rest of this article]

Keeping The Faith: Rising Above The Fear

Check out this short thought provoking article, I found, written by: Lorraine Cohen, the creator of: Powerfull Living (Blog).

This morning I received my daily inspirational email from Neale Donald Walsch. It felt so timely! I wanted to share it with you. Enjoy!

On this day of your life, I believe God wants you to know…

…that all the changes occurring right now on this planet are leading to a better life for all.

The movement here is going to be back to basics, back to what matters, back to our true values in families, in relationships, in business and commerce, in politics, and in the world.

Do not worry, therefore. This is the Time which has been predicted. And only good will come of it.

*****************************************************************

* Choose to be in trust and faith every day
* Give energy to the spiriual practices that keep you connected to your spirit and inner wisdom
* Put your attention on the people and things that keep you uplifted and strong
* Find something good to appreciate in each experience as you go through your day
* Celebrate all the gifts, miracles, and blessings that come to you
* Look for opportunities to be generous with your time, energy, money… to help someone else.
* Focus on what you love and cherish. Come back to the essence of what you value

Coping With The "Winds of Change"

Here is a thought provoking article on: "Lessons from the palm tree: coping with the winds of change", written by: Lola Fayemi, the creator of: "Nourishment For Your Spiritual Awaking" (Blog).

“Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine.” Robert C. Gallegher

"One of the few things we can be certain of in this world is uncertainty, however a majority of us resist change and fear uncertainty. This resistance to change can be found at the heart of most conflicts, both within us and in the world. But when you look at nature, things seem to evolve effortlessly without any attachment to what was. There are many lessons we can take from nature and one of them is flexibility.

The basic principle of the universe we live in is evolution and evolution is change with growth. This would mean that change is in harmony with nature, which is why resistance to change hurts so much. Flexibility is a much better strategy to adopt and for a great example of flexibility we need look no further than the palm tree.

When my awakening process began a few years ago it was triggered by my Dad’s illness and I was temporarily broken by the experience. When he came out of hospital I totally fell apart and fell into a depression. Looking back I can see that the resistance to change was the source of the depression not my Dad’s illness. I so wanted things to be different from how they were at that point and didn’t feel able to let that go and accept the situation for what it was.

There were many knock on effects from my Dad’s illness including my Mum’s health taking a drastic turn for the worse too. Whenever I would talk to people about it, there was a particular sentence I would say that would fill me with such deep sorrow and dread, a lump would appear in my throat and I would well up. This sentence was “things are never gonna be the same again!” Well thank God for that, things are a 1000% better now!

Here’s what the palm tree can teach us about being flexible when things are changing around us:

In a hurricane it stays rooted to the ground

In times of hurricanes, it’s common for trees to uproot and fall to the ground.  Not the palm tree though! They have a bendy trunk which allows them to bend, sometimes nearly touching the ground but they don’t uproot. 

Question: How can you stay grounded while remaining flexible to what’s going on around you?

The palm tree grows upwards

While many trees grow outward, the palm tree grows upwards.  Trees that grow outwards become stronger and less flexible.  The palm tree’s strength comes not from it’s robustness but from it’s flexibility, all the while soaring skyward.

Question: What can you do to change your growth from outward to upward?

They have deep roots

Palm trees have such deep roots that in times of drought they are able to tap into deep sources of water that exist deep within the ground." .. [read the rest of this article]

Is It A Sin To Be Poor?

Here is an interesting article on: "It Is A Sin To Be Poor", written by: Lyman Reed, the creator of: "Creating a Better LIfe" (Blog).

“The law also applies to our demonstrations of prosperity. We cannot be very happy if we are poor, and nobody needs to be poor. It is a sin to be poor. You may ask whether Jesus cited any example of poverty’s being a sin? Yes. You will find it in the story of the prodigal son. That is often used as a text to preach to moral sinners, but a close study of it shows that Jesus was teaching the sin of lack and how to gain plenty. It is a wonderful prosperity lesson.” — Charles Fillmore, Prosperity

If, as I’ve said before, spirituality is that which gives life, then there is nothing less spiritual than poverty.

It would be nice to be able to just say to people “Don’t be poor.”  And sometimes it seems that’s what people are doing when they are throwing around quotes like “It is a sin to be poor” or this one:

“Whatever may be said in praise of poverty, the fact remains that it is not possible to live a really complete or successful life unless one is rich.” — Wallace Wattles, The Science of Getting Rich

If we stop there, all we’ve done is define the problem, and we can fall into the trap of blaming either ourselves or others for our failure.

But we need to get off of that quickly, and move on to solutions.

Charity Doesn’t Work

According to the two works that I cited above, there is only one long term solution to the problem of poverty: a connection to our Source (God, the Universe, Fred, whatever you want to call It.)

This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t feed those who are hungry - one of the great teachers used his spiritual powers to do just that, and commanded his disciples to do the same.

But then there’s also this story, in which Jesus basically said “F’ em.”

It seems to me that the difference in the situations was that in the first two teachings, the feeding wasn’t just to put food in their mouths, but to do it in conjunction with teaching them, so that they could do it for themselves.

Simply putting food in front of people may keep their hearts beating, but if that is all we do, then nothing changes in the long run.  As a matter of fact, giving people food, shelter, and clothing without teaching them the basic principles of becoming prosperous themselves can turn them into slaves." ..  [read the rest of this article]

A Guide to Recovering Your Stolen Identity!

Here is an article, I found on: "The Sherlock Holmes Guide to Recovering Your Stolen Identity", written by: Jonathan Mead, as was posted on: Zen Habits.net

"As technology rapidly increases and the information age expands, our identities are at an increasing risk for being stolen. But it’s not a hacker trying to steal your social security number that should be causing you to lose sleep. It’s the ownership of your mind that’s at stake.

Most of us work at boring jobs, doing the same thing day in and day out. We’re trying to liberate ourselves from these dead-end pursuits (that’s why you’re here right?) but it’s not always easy.

The answer society has given us is to buy more things:

* Buy this Porsche and you’ll feel like a movie star.
* Buy this Swiffer Sweeper and all your problems will be solved!
* Buy this flat screen TV so you can distract yourself from the fact that you really don’t like what you do for a living.

The answer we’re given is not a change of attitude or perspective, but a product. What they’re really saying is: “If you have this thing you’ll finally live up to the image of who you think you should be, or rather, who we think you should be.”

This might sound a bit extreme. Most of us can’t imagine that we’re living a lie and that stuff is ruling our lives. That’s only because we’ve been so brilliantly duped.

I, personally, have defined myself by my stuff. Who hasn’t? I’ve thought that as soon as I get this car, this job, these clothes and this image, I’ll finally be somebody. But as soon as I get that stuff, as soon as I feel that my image is complete, I’m on to the next thing. I need an upgrade. I’m in search of the next thing to make me feel better.

The battle for your authenticity is not an easy one, but there are some things you can do to get started on the road to recovering your stolen identity.

So, you want to recover your stolen mind? I’ve enlisted the help of Master Detective Sherlock Holmes to help guide us on our search.

1. Accept that your identity is in jeopardy.

“You do occasionally find a carrion crow among the eagles.” - Sherlock Holmes

The first step on the path to recovering your true self is accepting that your identity is in jeopardy. You may be living a lie. That doesn’t mean that your whole life has been a fraud (see: how to not sell out). This isn’t black and white. There will probably be a lot of grey area in between. The first step is to realize that the socially acceptable path to success may not be your path. Compromise is okay, but not at the expense of your soul. A partially free mind is just not acceptable." .. [read the rest of this article]